Raychelle
Cassada Lohmann, M.S., LPC
Teen
Angst/Psychology Today
Kayla looked at herself one more time in
the mirror before racing down the stairs to meet her prom date. She was psyched
about going to the prom with Calvin. Even more exciting was the party
afterward. Calvin’s parents had agreed to throw a big bash after the prom and
everyone was going! Calvin’s parents were super cool, way cooler than the other
lame parents, who’d rather their kids go somewhere else to party. Sure, there’d
be alcohol, but at least they’d be safe at Calvin’s with his parents around.
Following the prom everyone flooded to
the party. Calvin’s parents held the belief that teens were going to be teens
and if they were going to drink after prom at least let them be safe in their
home. As his parents greeted the guests at the door they had the teens drop
their keys into a bucket. They were being responsible parents because no one
was going to leave a party they hosted and drive; especially if he/she had been
drinking. As the keys dropped in the bucket, little did the parents know one of
those teen:
·
took medication
for epileptic seizures
·
had weed in the
inside of his tux pocket
·
would have to be
taken to the hospital that night for alcohol poisoning
Throughout my career I have been asked
my thoughts on “social hosting.” Specifically, I’ve been asked, “If my teen has
friends over and I collect the keys, isn’t it safer to let them drink in my
home than to risk being out there on the road?” You know teens are going to
drink anyway, “So why not teach them responsibility?” I just shake my head in
awe at the lack of logic behind that thought process. Being a social host and
condoning the use of alcohol with minors is just not a good idea.
Although the definition of a Social Host
varies across states, generally it is a person who:
·
furnishes alcohol
with no motive of monetary gain
·
has no special
relationship, such as an employer, with the guest
·
serves alcohol or
condones the consumption of alcohol on property that the host controls
·
may be either an
adult or a minor
Most states have social hosting laws.
For the majority of states parents can be held accountable if they host and are
aware that minors are drinking. Social
host liability laws are needed to help deter parents and other individuals from
hosting underage parties and purchasing or providing alcohol to underage youth.
Plus, they send out a strong message that hosting alcoholic events for minors
isn’t acceptable. According to the University of Minnesota's Alcohol
Epidemiology Program, Social Host Liability laws are effective.
Surveys show that the most common
sources of alcohol are in the youth’s home or from persons over the age of 21
who purchase alcohol for them. Research
supports social host liability laws. In
an analysis of all 50 states, social host laws were associated with reductions
in drinking-driving and heavy drinking.
Three key points to ask yourself if you’re entertaining the idea of
being a social host:
·
What values are
you trying to teach your teen? Providing an illegal haven for teens to drink in
the comfort of your home is not a viable option. If you want to teach your teen
to be a law abiding citizen then you are the role model. Teaching teens to
sneak around the law or that they don't have to abide by it, isn’t a good value
to instill.
·
How would you
like it if another parent stepped into your role and decided to allow your
child to do something that you didn’t condone? Respect other parent’s wishes
especially if you have assumed the responsibility for their child by allowing
them into your home.
·
If points one and
two aren’t convincing, what about a potential law suit? Can you imagine the
legal liability of allowing a minor or another person’s child to drink at your
home? Is it really worth the risk?
Bottom Line: Creating an underage pub
for teens is not a good idea and moreover it’s illegal.
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